Mask my self

It is hard to keep up this facade
of happiness
while all i feel is longing for a time gone by
in your arms
holding me tight.

It is hard to dress my face with a smile
when all i want
is to cry, bawl my eyes out
tear at my hair
and scream until i'm horse

It is hard to pretend that everything is ok
when all i feel is loneliness
drowning me in to its depth of darkness.

It is hard to acknowledge your presence
when all i want to do is crawl away
hide under a thick blanket
of misery

It is hard to act like i don't care
when others are all over you
and i have no say
in the midst.

It's hard
Goddamn it; it's hard.

But it's ok,
not like you care anymore,
right?